Waterbowl League – Game Week 7

This week we have a special match report from Brianne Tribune reporter Gerard Le Cordonnier

Of Pus and Blood

‘Allo, after my last match report I was stricken with a variety of maladies. Now refreshed, with boils lanced and drained, I have returned. Partially due to ever increasing medical bills. And for the finest Tilean chirurgeons, one pays the finest price.

With nary a tickle in my throat I took my seat. The blanket of blizzard did not calm the spirits of the 24 thousand in attendance, with the Weather Veins throng being particularly vocal.

Perhaps it was the remnants of Doktor Morosini’s elixirs, but I felt utterly engrossed in the sidelines in the moments before the game. So much so that all my focus seemed to be directed towards a Weather Veins player. His obsidian eyes seemed to be luring me in. His porcelain skin as pale as the snow that flickered before him….

With points even in the Lustria Division, both teams are looking towards the Top 3 spots and Play Off glory! Following a tough scoreless draw vs Chaos Dwarfs, the Vampires are looking to carry on their impressive season.

Detroit Pox City slithered on to the pitch with yet another new Pestigor. Perhaps they have a farm somewhere that they are breeding them…on second thoughts, the less I know about that, the better. With a win over the Baltimore Skavens under their belt, can the maggot filled mutants claim the victory today?

With coin tossed and halves picked, it was time for some slightly living Blood Bowl Action!

In my time away, the Nurgle team have evidently been working on their kicking routine. Bruce Lŭvgŭnn lofted the ball long, the entire Pox City team blitzed forward, and the ball settled in a snow mound deep in the Vampire’s end zone.

Through the thick snow it was hard to fathom the action occurring on the pitch, with a lull in the snow letting one see the Vampire’s scoring half way through the first half.

Another kick off and another great riposte from the Nurgle players. With as much elegance as a diseased man can have, City’s team drove forward with a fervor, which lasted all of a few seconds. For all of their enthusiasm, the Vampires attacked back with the blood lust they are famed for, scoring a second touchdown with minutes left on the clock.

Frustration was setting in with the Detroit Pox City players by this point. Ankh Thayer attempted to launch the ball at the head of star Pestigor Phillip. But the goat creature managed to swipe the ball from its path. The referee dismissed Tomas Parasite shortly afterwards for dropping an elbow on a prone Veins thrall. Despite the Coach’s protestations that Parasite’s arm fell off onto the player, both player and coach received their marching orders.

The horn sounded with the score set at two to zero in favour of the bloodsuckers.

The atmosphere at halftime was tense. The Nurgle fans distraught and fighting amongst one another, completely divergent to their usual jovial nature. Curses and prayers to the Pox God were interspersed with bellows and infighting, as I made my way to sample the local Svartsoppa.

As is usual for this season of Blood Bowl, the halftime action left a lot to be desired. A troupe of mimes played out a series of acts, seemingly of a comic nature, judging by the guffaws of the local oafs. I, however, hold myself to a higher level of comedy, having seen the Great Luigi at the Ivory Theatre in Estalia.

With a glass of Von Culper’s Haimaphiltre and a biroldo I took my seat for the second half. Thankfully the food and drink warmed me, as the blizzard showed no signs of subsiding.

The Nurgle fans’ temper hadn’t subsided during the interval, with a large slab of masonry launched on the pitch, clipping the head of Plăstur-Kăstur as the ball was kicked skywards by the Vampires. The fans’ anger was the catalyst that Pox City needed, however, and they managed a decent drive down their right hand flank.

But as the Nurgle wave swept down the pitch they crashed against the rocks that were the Weather Veins defence, attack after attack being thwarted yards from the line. Bruce Lŭvgŭnn managed to incapacitate a Veins player before new Goat..man..thing ran the ball in for a touchdown!

Pressing for the win, Pox City shifted their kicking team towards one flank. However Lŭvgŭnn was still euphoric by his tackle before hand, trickling the kick only a few feet, causing a quick touchback. Before City could get their line shifted, the Weather Veins were already halfway down the pitch. Even a desperation tackle attempt by Phillip couldn’t stop the third touchdown.

With the horn for full time, and three points for the Vampire Counts, it was time to depart.

The Weather Veins carry on their push for the playoffs against the Dapper Lycanthropes, and to this I wish them all the best.

As for Detroit Pox City, they take on the Khemri team the Bone Idles. Despite the loss, I believe the Nurgle swarm can pick up a win.

As always, Santé


Visit Element Games here (Use the code DAN2300 at Checkout for double points)

For more Blood Bowl action:

Listen to the Two Drunk Flings podcast here

Listen to the Anything But A One podcast here


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