Waterbowl League – Game Week 1

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VS

I Like Big Bulls and I Cannot Lie

 

Week 1 in the Lustria Division of the Waterbowl Premier League. My Nurgle team, Detroit Pox City, took on the Chaos Dwarf team, I Like Big Bulls And I Cannot Lie, coached by Dave Minnis (Tintenfisch).

With one inebriated spectator to give it that Blood Bowl tournament feel, the match was on!

Jim and Bob
Jim and Bob Copyright: Games Workshop

 

Jim Johnson: “Greetings, sports fans! The excitement is electric in the air as we kick off the inaugural game of the Waterbowl Premier League!”

Bob Bifford: “That’s right, Jim. We are looking forward to a few months of violence, madness and occasionally a game of Blood Bowl may breakout.”

Jim: “It’s a beautiful day here as the first game of the blood bowl season begins. On one side we have Detroit Pox City, formerly a touring band and their fan club, now riddled with the diseases of the lifestyle.”

Bob: “Lets just say it’s more than one kind of tackle you should avoid from Belial, their pestigor.”

Jim: “Facing them tonight is the Chaos Dwarf team, I Like Big Bulls And I Cannot Lie. Surprisingly without an aforementioned Big Bull on their team.”

Bob: “Well, it is still Minotaur rutting season, Jim.”

Jim: “That’s not anything we need to witness, or think about, Bob. And here they are standing on the pitch, ready to do battle. I think we’re in for an exciting game.”

Bob: “Eleven thousand fans are here today, although the Nurgle fans seem to have lost their singing voice today.”

Jim: “Hopefully that isn’t contagious, Bob. And the Hobgoblin kicker launches the ball deep into the Nurgle half.”

Bob: “Belial has the ball and a fleshy cage of rotters around him. If he wasn’t ill before, I think he may be soon”

Jim: “As vile as it may seem, that unhygienic mess could be the safest place on the pitch”

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Jim: “That was a collision of half bull, half dwarf and half man, half goat. Truly a bloody mismatch.”

Bob: “Truly an awe inspiring spectacle, Jim. Let’s see if he can pull himself together.”

1 Minute later-

Jim: “Out on the rancid sideline the Bull Centaur falls over three of his four feet and lands face first in the astrogranite!”

Bob: “They’ll be finding his teeth for weeks, Jim!”

-3 Minutes later-

Bob: “It’s carnage in the centre of the pitch, punches and headbuts thrown, a great extravaganza!”

Jim: “There’s an opening, Bob. Maybe that Rotter was an elf in a former life, because he’s breaking down the backfield….The ball goes skyward….And it is caught by the rotter…and it is a TOUCHDOWN!”

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Bob: “Lets see if they can untangle those Hobgoblins from Beth the Beast before kick off”

1-0

-HALF TIME-

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Jim: “The half time entertainment today brought to us by Hard Block Cafe.”

Bob: “The hard block on the pestigor seems to have been shaken off. Amazing resilience.”

Jim: “That or the masses of maggots holding him together. They’re back on the pitch for the second half. Can the Chaos Dwarfs make a comeback?”

Bob: “And we are off!” 

Jim: “The Hobgoblins are scurrying about trying to move the ball down the field. Will the bloated green line stop their attack?”

-1 Minute later-

Bob: “Belial had that Hobgoblin in his sights with that blitz. He skewered him, Jim!”

Jim: “That is a delicacy in the Southlands, Bob.”

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-3 Minutes later-

Bob: “Stomping players may be against the rules, but that hasn’t stopped that Hobgoblin from doing it.”

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Jim: “If you aren’t cheating, you aren’t trying, Bob. And if the referee doesn’t see it, all the better.”

-8 Minutes later-

Jim: “With more tentacles than a Nipponese market, Beth is causing trouble for the I Like Big Bulls and I Cannot Lie team.”

Bob: “That team name is a mouthful, and a mouthful of fist is what Ace the Bloater just got from that Blocker!”

Jim: “He’s lost teeth there, but the Chaos Dwarf team have lost the game! The referee blows the whistle for the end of the game!”

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Final Thoughts

Started the league off well. Next match scheduled is against Goblins, which may not be as high scoring as my 3-2 epic in the Waterbowl Tournament.

After the first night of games the Lustria division looks like this:

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#
Coach
Team
Race
TV
Pld
W
D
L
TD
Cas
Pts
1
TheGngrNoob
Detroit Pox City
Nurgle
1030k
1
1
0
0
1
0
3
2
cjblackburn
Max Deadroom
Undead
1030k
1
1
0
0
1
0
3
3
Tintenfisch
I like big bulls and I cannot lie
Chaos Dwarf
1030k
1
0
0
1
-1
0
0
4
Queek
Baltimore Skavens
Skaven
960k
1
0
0
1
-1
0
0
5
douglowe
I, Eldarius
Wood Elf
990k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
6
Ringbeard
Guardians of Ghrond
Dark Elf
1000k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
7
narked
Manannsheim Buccaneers
Human
1000k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
8
The Martian
Lil Green Meanies
Orc
990k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
9
Chebby
Clipstone Coalminers
Dwarf
1000k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
10
rollingskullz
Honest To Gob
Goblin
850k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
11
Jimbob
Kracked Toof
Orc
970k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
12
Isvan
The Weather Veins
Vampire
1000k
0
0
0
0
0
0
0

So I am in a division with some of the top Blood Bowl players in the country. I’ll aim for 4th place and be happy for an above :500 record

 

Visit Element Games here (Use the code DAN2300 at Checkout for double points)

For more Blood Bowl action:

Listen to the Two Drunk Flings podcast here

Listen to the Anything But A One podcast here

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YouTube Channel – Coming Soon

 

I am going to start a Wargames YouTube account

Primarily focusing on Warhammer, Warhammer 40k and Blood Bowl with a sprinkling of Kings Of War, Shadespire and possibly Historical Wargaming.

Of course I am learning all of this on the fly, so any advice would be helpful.

Who knows, I may appear across all the media!

 

Exploring the Mirrored City

Lucky Me

In my spare time I like to have a flutter on the football. I won a little bet (£93 in my pocket) so bought the Shadespire starter set.

The rules are simple enough to learn, the cards make it complex, the models are amazingly sculpted. All in all it was a great purchase.

First Match

As i couldn’t get to a gaming store, my first game was against my 10 year old. As a veteran of 100s of Pokemon battles, he easily picked up the rules.

Me as Khorne

Him as Stormcast

The first match went with his tactics being to turtle up and claim objectives. My tactics were to load up Saek and chop everything!

I won. Yes, it was against a child, but as Vin Diesel says..

Image result for fast and furious winning is winning meme

 

Picking a Warband

After my debut match of Shadespire I was inspired to paint up my Ironskull’s Boyz. Foregoing the standard colour scheme (Yellow? Seriously?) I used these as the test models for my future Orks project.

Still only at tabletop level, they will do while I get some games in

Ironskulls 1
The Ladz

 

Ironskulls 2
Hakka – My favourite of the sculpts

 

Ironskulls 3
Gurzag and Basha

 

Ironskulls 4
Bonekutta

 

Da Boyz Voyage Forth

With deck advice from the fantastic Facebook Shadespire Community, I now have a basic understanding on the deckbuilding aspect of the game.

And of course I had to find a related podcast. For this it was Claim The City, an excellent resource.

Now to buy up the other warbands for cards and minis.

Afterall, no such thing as too many different games, right?

 

Visit Element Games here (Use the code DAN2300 at Checkout for double points)

Listening to Claim the City podcast here

Adepticon Reveal 2018

WOKE UP THIS MORNING, FEELING FINE…

It is Adepticon and as is tradition Games Workshop took this opportunity to reveal their big projects for the next year or so. With the reveal being at 2:00 GMT, I knocked it on the head to check in the morning.

With our joking predictions aside (Warhammer movie; Dolph Lundgren as Dorn, Antonio Banderas as Sanguinius, and Codex: Squats) I logged in to check the Community page

 

GIANT FRICKIN’ KNIGHT

Copyright: Games Workshop

 

After a cracking video, with a grimly faced hirsute man giving me facial hair envy, a new Knight is revealed. With more dakka than an average Ork army, this Knight looks great. I especially like the shoulder turrets.

And now that I have mentioned Orks

 

IS IT CODEXES OR CODICES?

 

Adepticon Reveal 2018 - 1
Robots and Clowns and Men in Black, Oh My! Copyright: Games Workshop

 

After the aforementioned Imperial Knights kit, it’s only right they should have a new codex. I am curious to see if any Sentinel sized critters get added in.

Then comes Harlequins to round off the Aeldari races, and Deathwatch to kill them all. Even with my Anti-Imperial zeal, I have a soft spot for the Deathwatch.

But this comes to my only gripe, more waiting for Orks. (Although this does give me more time to save some pennies in the Squiggy Bank!)

The next Warhammer 40,000 news was the roll out of Roll Call, an official 40k army builder. After playing with the AoS one, this is a great idea.

 

HE WATCHES, LURKING BENEATH THE SEA

After a lot of teasing, the Idoneth Deepkin have finally been shown as the new faction for Age of Sigmar!

Copyright : Games Workshop

War Turtles!

 

Copyright: Games Workshop

Sea Unicorn!

 

Copyright: Games Workshop

An Octopus with a knife!

 

This new faction does not disappoint. The pale skinned eyeless warriors look ace, and I am interested in seeing how the army works as a whole.

 

EVIL BALL OF DEATH!

This is bizarre in an amazing way.

Copyright: Games Workshop

 

No idea how it will fit in to AoS, but I like it.

 

IT’S CLOSE TO MIDNIGHT
SOMETHING EVIL’S LURKING FROM THE DARK

Copyright: Games Workshop

This intrigues me. I would like to know more.

 

I’M GOING DEEPER UNDERGROUND

After the announcement of a Warhammer TCG, which doesn’t interest me, it was GW pledging more support for the fantastic Warhammer Underworlds: Shadespire.

This is great as it is a brilliant game to introduce people to the hobby and even to convert card players.

Glossing over the next few:

  • Independent Event Exclusive Miniatures
  • Changes to White Dwarf; More kitbashing and Battle Reports
  • Warhammer Legends: Classic miniatures and rules

 

FINALLY…

Copyright: Games Workshop

 

PLASTIC

SISTERS

OF

BATTLE!!!

Released in 2019, but we’ve been waiting 20 years anyway ha

 

Overall it is an exciting year ahead for the hobby

 

Visit Element Games here (Use the code DAN2300 at Checkout for double points)

For great Warhammer 40,000 lore, listen to Masters of the Forge here

The White Vipers

As part one of my Red Corsairs fluff it is only fair that I start at the beginning. Here is some background on the White Vipers, the Loyalist chapter from which Imarkad descended.

WHITE VIPERS

– White Vipers –

White Vipers

Founding Chapter: Imperial Fists
Founding: Unknown, after Age of Apostasy 
Known Descendants: Serpents of Khadingria (Chaos Warband)
Chapter Master: Chapter Master Iauzu
Homeworld: Fleet Based, formally Khadingria
Fortress-Monastery: Scales of Integrity
Colours: Jade green, left arm grey; helmet stripe in company colour; gold aquila. Symbol is a white snake on a grey background.
Specialty: Boarding actions
Strength: 120 Marines, 200 Primaris
Battle Cry: None

The White Vipers are a Loyalist Space Marine Chapter formed following the Age of Apostasy. The White Vipers were almost wiped out and its homeworld annihilated when the 4th Company turned traitor and attacked the Fortress-Monastery with help from Red Corsairs forces. Yet with help from the Storm Lords, and Cawl’s Primaris technology, the Chapter has been rebuilt as a fleet based force.

In addition to raiding Red Corsair ships, the White Vipers often defend Imperial trade routes, building a great relationship with the Adeptus Administratum. These relationships have further ensured the survival of the chapter, with equipment being dispatched at the earliest opportunity.

Chapter History

Formed from Imperial Fist Geneseed, the White Vipers at first had the stoic and reserved demeanour of their progenitor. Attention to detail was of the upmost importance, battle plans being revised up to the evening of attack, and then implemented with mechanical precision.

The residents of their homeworld of Khadingria had developed a culture around balance. For each plant dug up, another was planted, for each minute in battle was a minute of contemplation.

Every aspect of forthcoming battles was planned to minute precision. With plans performed to the letter, without addition or subtraction.

This practice continued until the rebuilding following the destruction caused by the Fourth Company’s treachery.

Betrayal of the Fourth Company

After a mission to halt a Dark Eldar raid on an Imperial outpost, Captain Imarkad was frustrated at the Chapter Master Iauzu’s orders to halt a counter attack that could have destroyed the entirety of the retreating Xenos force. On the voyage back to Khadingria, Imarkad’s period of contemplation was interrupted by voices from the warp. They encouraged his seething, forming plans and images of betrayal and ultimate control of his own destiny.

As penance for his outburst to the Chapter Master, Captain Imarkad was tasked in leading the 2nd & 6th Squads, Fourth Company to investigate a distress call on Nannak, a forest moon previously thought uninhabited by humans. On landfall they were attacked by a giant forest wyrm, incapacitating the squads’ Rhinos. Proceeding on foot they found a large clearing, a smouldering fire in the centre.

Imarkad led the squads forward towards the fire, where they happened upon fourteen hooded men. Without warning the largest of the men struck a black bell. Hundreds of thousands of flies swarmed around the Marines and hooded men. The flies entered the Marines’ masks and any bare skin, attacking from the inside outwards. The Marines fired their bolters at the hooded men, but where bullets hit, the flesh dissipated into foul black fluid. As the bodily fluid hit the ground, Plaguebearers emerged, their swords scything down the White Vipers.

The man with the bell revealed himself to be a Chaos Sorcerer of the Red Corsairs. Imarkad was surrounded by Plaguebearers, yet unscathed. He had thrown his lot in with Chaos long before. The slain White Vipers were reborn as Plague Marines with Imarkad as a Champion of Chaos, imbued with ruinous powers.

With the Plague Marines, Red Corsair allies, and untold numbers of cultists, Imarkad led his force in an assault on the White Vipers fortress-monastery. The White Vipers were repelling the attack, until the remainder of the Fourth Company attacked from within. They attacked with no remorse, taking over the Vox system and broadcasting offers of reprieve for surrender. The surviving 2nd company members, along with the initiates of the 6th company threw down their weapons.

Chapter Master Iauzu led the 1st and 3rd Company in a retreat towards the chapter’s Thunderhawk hanger, shepherding hundreds of civilians with them. Under fire from the Red Corsairs lascannons, the Thunderhawks managed to escape into orbit to the severely damaged Scales of Integrity.

Rebuilding of the Chapter

The White Vipers craft fled the system and had their distress beacon answered by a ship from the Storm Lords chapter. The Storm Lords and Adeptus Administratum restocked the chapter with equipment and rehoused the civilians on Imperial planets. Iauzu swore an oath to repay the Storm Lords, with the White Vipers embarking on a 10 year campaign to wipe out Orks from the moons of Sarrogan.

After the campaign the White Vipers saw their numbers swell with the addition of Cawl’s Primaris Marines. The survivors of both the rebellion and campaign formed the new First Company, “The Fangs of Khadingria”, with the Primaris Marines forming the Second and Third companies.

The chapter, now Fleet based, defends Imperial trade routes from attack, be they Xenos or Chaotic in nature. Relying on close ranged fire power; they board enemy craft and perform surgical strikes on the command deck and engines.

Notable Battles

  • Annexation of Doffad 12: Quelled an anti-Imperial uprising on the world of Doffad 12
  • Battle at Filtesst Septenous: Rescued an Imperial city from a Dark Eldar raiding force
  • Betrayal of Khadingria: Captain Imarkad led the 4th Company in a rebellion against the rest of the Chapter, with support from Red Corsair forces. The majority of the Chapter was slain or fell to Chaos
  • Sarrogan Crusade: Joined the Storm Lords in a decade long crusade to destroy Orks on the moons of the planet Sarrogan

 

Visit Element Games here (Use the code DAN2300 at Checkout for double points)

For great Warhammer 40,000 lore, listen to Masters of the Forge here

The Future is Bright, The Future is…Green?

POWER OF THE WAAAGH!

The temptation to collect a new 40k army is strong. Even though I have the huge amount of Chaos Space Marines (4500+ points) just crying out to a multitude of Gods for assembly and a lick of paint, the Green tide is calling.

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HISTORY LESSON

My first 40k model was a metal Plague Marine with Meltagun, but the first army I fell for were the Orks.

This was back in 3rd Edition Warhammer 40k. The Codex, full of ragtag vehicles and crude weaponry, drew me in. I also had the advantage that my friend started collecting them but fancied a change. (This surprised me after watching his force eat my proxied Deathwing army).

Another layer on my Orks love was the Battle for Armageddon campaign. I recall sitting on a beach in Cornwall and reading White Dwarf 248 and Codex: Armageddon after a wander to Games Workshop Truro. Reading about Thraka and playing in the campaign are still great memories.

I attempted to build my own small warband; Couple of mobs of slugga boyz, a mob of shootas, storm boyz and some mega armoured Nobs in a waggon with a Warboss. Drybrushed the lot of it and pushed it about for a few games, getting battered all along, until I switched to a stupidly hard Necron army.

THE MIGHTY HORDE OF WARBOSS, ERM, PAUL

In the display case at GW Manchester there is a monumental Ork army. Paul, the manager, has a gargantuan army featuring some of the greatest conversions I’ve ever seen. He has enough models to play a 20,000 point game!

Great use of the Blood Bowl miniatures. (Copyright: Paul Evans)
Start of an Ork submarine. (Copyright: Paul Evans)

And the monumental Ork creation, Gitstix!

Oh my Lord! (Copyright: Paul Evans)
Ork Tin Opener: (Copyright: Paul Evans)
Before…. (Copyright: Paul Evans)
After!  (Copyright: Paul Evans)

AT AN ORK IN THE ROAD

I know I shouldn’t try and collect a second army (especially with the load of Dark Eldar stuff I have gathering dust), but I really want some Orks.

Therefore I am using the carrot and stick method. For each thing I knock off my To Do List, I am allowed one Ork based thing. Be that a unit of Boyz or a vehicle.

Treating myself!

HUMBLE BEGINNINGS

So I’ve grabbed a couple of tanks, stripped them down and basecoated them Averland Sunset and blocked out some parts.

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So far so very Bad Moons. But these won’t be Bad Moons or any of the major clans. My own will be Viking themed!

Stay tuned for more

Visit Element Games here (Use the code DAN2300 at Checkout for double points)

Nurgle Repaint – Part 1

The Nurgle team that took me to an Unofficial 16th place in The Waterbowl (the results were put in wrong, so I had a loss entered for my final win. I demand a recount!) was in need of a repaint.

I need to decide on a paint scheme and a skin scheme for the Rotters.

BATH TIME

Nurgle Repaint 1 - 1
Like a beast from the depths

 

After a soak overnight in methylated spirits, and a scrub with the electronic toothbrush, they were ready to prime.

However……

WINTER HAS COME

Nurgle Repaint 1 - 2
Not conducive to priming

This ruined my priming plans.

So another few days waiting to start the painting

Visit Element Games here (Use the code DAN2300 at Checkout for double points)

For more Blood Bowl action:

Listen to the Two Drunk Flings podcast here

Listen to the Anything But A One podcast here